Martin Ucik – Falling In Love With Someone Good for You.
January 15, 2016
04:20 – 07:00 Introducing Martin Ucik.. and some basic points about falling in love.
07:00 – 13:02 Making 3 basic distinctions: infatuation, psychological connections, and developing a relationship out of friendship.
13:02 – 14:50 Pitfalls of instant hormonal relationships and why do we fall OUT of love?
14:50 – 16:11 It depends on which of the 3 kinds of love we’re talking about.
17:20 – 19:38 Problems when people come from different levels of development which affect what choices are available to each in the relationship.
20:00 – 21:45 What would “integral” people do? Three parameters: intimacy, passion, commitment.
21:45 – 29:54 Levels (similar to the chakras) of “integral” and what (and how) to relate with a partner on each level. Also on their vocabulary.
29:54 – 32:15 Advice to men about sharing feelings: sometimes it’s better to share them with a friend or a professional, if the woman can’t hold those “vulnerable” feelings he expresses.
32:15 – 34:16 Subtle expression of emotions usually comes online at pluralistic “green.”
34:16 – 37:14 Beyond green – an “authentic” way to express life purpose, which may require living without a partner, but may not.
39:00 – 43:52 How to overcome the difficulties of growth; defining self-worth and identity beyond the qualities of the partner.
43:52 – 46:39 “Transcend and include” means we don’t stop all the contents of earlier stages, but we learn healthier ways to express them – right up to relationships as a spiritual practice.
46:40 – 49:10 Our efforts toward peace at home as part of creating peace on earth.
50:00 – Summary from Martin, a quick rerun, and an addendum from Heidi.
54:01 – Find Martin at integralrelationship.com for news and further info and links.
54:40 – Don’t forget the Blab afterward at: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AgqZ19FpLDI
Christiane Pelmas – The Role Of Sexuality In Human Life And How We Can Use It To Grow Our Relationships.
January 22, 2016
04:10 – Varied responses to our publicity and first question: What is sexuality?Christiane responds, “Generative energy that creates form out of chaos.” She explains….
06:62 – Erotic intelligence as one of Wilber’s/Gardner’s lines of intelligence? Perhaps the primary intelligence that has allowed us to move beyond simple survival.
9:40 – Why do we have such a problem with sexuality? Religion, money, etc. “Our culture has evolved to be anti-human.”
12:25 – Are we moving toward humanization of our culture? Christiane thinks so, of necessity.
14:00 – How basic and preoccupied we are with sexuality for very good reasons, not only out of ignorance.
15:45 – Do good relationships and good sexuality reinforce each other? Chemistry and more…
17:35 – Creating relationships “so that” we can become mystically poised to offer ourselves in all our activities for a better world.
18:50 – Is emotional intimacy necessary for a sexual relationship, for example, pornography?
22:00 – Pornography can create a feeling of wellness and safety, which backfires on us.
22:30 – 24:00 Are romance novels like pornography for women? No, not quite!
24:00 – 26:07 Lack of caring / touching for boys after ages 5 -7.
26:07 – 28:23 How that works for girls and the outcome orientation it induces.
28:24 – Big question from a male watcher: How can males relate to women affectionately?
30:06 – 33:48 Slow down! Even though it may be unpleasant sometimes. Sensate, focus, etc.
34:12 – Presence (mindfulness, embodiment) is at the core!
35:50 – What if orgasm isn’t the end of sex, if it continues past that? And how do we get there?
37:00 – How long is your menu? It’s infinite!
38:50 – Play! Its importance and women’s (especially) changing map of sexuality.
40:14 – 42:02 MANopause!
42:02 – 46:13 The stages of sexuality over our lifetimes.
47:17 – 49:16 The later years – what’s coming? Deep, almost rumbling, earthquakes…
49:16 – 51:40 The denial of our down-and-dirty humanness in favor of “transcendence.” Savoring both the up AND the down.
51:41 – Blab connections (blab.im/traviata56), some personal notes, how to reach us, how to reach Christiane: christiane@me.com, rewilding.com, magnificentlover.com.
4:35 Earlier stages of humanity.
6:08 Sexuality as a developmental line?
7:32 How children perceive sex of older people, especially their parents.
8:07 We don’t yet have schemes for lines; we are new to this way of seeing things.
9:55 We are lacking the vocabulary.
11.16 Allergy or addiction.
12:19 The quadrants.
13:18 First sexuality.
14:27 Sexuality in magenta/ tribal consciousness.
17:10 Red level – power and rape.
18:36 Rape in the blue level.
21:00 Do not enjoy sex!
21:38 Sexuality in orange.
24:10 Sexuality in green.
25:30 Being born into the culture.
28:38 Being gay.
31:00 Sexual, creative, and spiritual impulse.
31:50 Conscious growth.
32:45 What comes beyond green?
33:30 Emotional intelligence and behavioral patterns.
39:00 Sexual role play.
42:57 The red level: difference men/women and gay people.
46:44 Eroticism at any moment.
48:05 The expression of sexuality.
48:54 Spirituality and sex.
50:06 Relationship to sex.
Dr. Keith Witt – Loving Completely – How We Can Learn To Keep Our Intimate Relationships Alive
January 29, 2016
04:25 – 10:37 How come we repeat our relationship mistakes?
10:44 – 16:03 Unconditional love? Keith thinks not. Attunement is necessary. “Be aware with acceptance and caring intent.” Self observation.
16:03 – 24:00 How can we learn acceptance? What about shame? Developmental stages.
24:00 – 25:25 “Return to Love.” Poking perfectionism and what attracts a man.
25:25 – 29:33 Clarity, changing old habits.
29:37 – 31:30 Two kinds of commitment: “I’m going to stay with you as long as …” and “I’m going to do whatever it takes to make our love work.”
31:30 – “That’s why there’s no Unconditional Love.” Love becomes ever more demanding as we grow.
35:03 – 36:11 “A tantric process that takes us both to unity with God and with each other.”
36:10 – 39:40 What about monogamy? Monogamy promotes intimacy and depth.
39:40 – 43:54 Heidi notes that love is hard work – the opposite of what we hear in music, films, etc. How can you [Keith] inspire people to do that work? Non-violent communication, etc.
43:55 – 45:44 It require effort! But also play!
45:44 – 49:07 Generational changes, ignorance, and responsibility. How Keith got started.
49:07 – 54:05 Mark asks about the future of love. Keith responds.
54:05 – 59:10 Winding down remarks, asking Margherita for her takeaways. Margherita made a drawing! She’s not single, she’s whole!
59:47 – Last words by Mark, Keith, and Heidi.
2:01 Northern Europeans especially interested in this topic? Answer by Margherita.
3:51 Hans Kalben joins the room.
4:25 Henrik Wredmark joins the room and talks about his experience hearing Dr.Keith Witt speak.
5:15 Kids are getting better at relating and communicating.
6:00 Intergenerational relationships: children today can talk to their parents.
7:10 Relationships in the Integral world.
8:15 Margherita’s Christmas in Sweden with her family.
8:38 Monogamy – Hans Kalben.
9: 55 Growing in different directions.
11:00 A life not spent in a long-term monogamous relationship is not wasted…
11:50 Relationships give a gratis kick to personal development.
12.14 A question from the audience about an intimacy that lessoned after 24 years.
16:10 The drawing by Margherita.
17:40 A comment from the audience about friendship.
18:30 Integral relationships: we are our own best friends.
19:44 Joachim’s contribution, breakup and difficulty, commitment for future relationship.
21:00 Cultural requests in relationships – how can I be in a close relationship?
22:38 Become aware of patterns and the teachings in relationships.
23:24 Preview of next session with Katherine Woodward Thomas on Conscious Uncoupling.
24:28 A relationship beyond your wildest dreams needs dedication and effort.
25:40 Margherita on men’s way of expressing and communicating.
27:00 About playing.
28:40 Candy Javier Sakai joins from Tokyo and gives her idea about how to keep relationships alive.
30:30 Trust independent from the culture you are living in.
31:00 Japanese are conservative – only the youngest generation has changed. Life is different in Japan, and trust is necessary for a relationship.
34:32 Foreigners in Japan/ intimacy: Let’s go back to old school!
35: 20 Japanese women want blond guys; Japanese men want Russian women. Stereotypes and Prince Charming.
39:34 Levels in a relationship.
40:25 Question from the audience: What about black men in Japan?
40:45 Black men are romantic, and that is the catch for Japanese women.
41:40 What do foreigners find in Japan?
42:58 Coming back to Integral: diversity in the cultures.
44::25 Sexuality – need to know the people first?
45:00 It’s not consistency – always diversity (Candy).
45:38 Intimate relationships – how to keep them alive?
47:00 It is not that relationships just HAPPEN to stay alive.
47:30 Relationships accelerate your growth (Hans Kalben).
49:00 If you think you are enlightened, just go and visit your family for Thanksgiving.
49:15 Primary source for relationships is your motivation (Candy).
49:54 Dr.Keith Witt knows the human mind after 55,000 therapy sessions as a psychotherapist.
50:25 Hans: “The higher you go, the more conditional the love becomes.” Levels of development.
52:00 About tech challenges – the help of the universe!
Katherine Woodward Thomas – Conscious Uncoupling – The art of separation in close relationships.
February 5, 2016
03:35 – 04:54 Heidi’s history with “Calling in the One” and Katherine’s journey.
04:54 – 07:27 “Conscious Uncoupling” as a precursor of “Calling in the One.”
07:27 – Heidi talks about how it began for us, and how it became so much more.
09:05 – Katherine’s early experiences: finding God, coming home to an empty apartment.
11:26 -12:58 Setting an intention and going within to find the barriers.
12:58 – And still we slowly drifted apart; the mission queen.
TEASER? 14:23 – 16:06 What would a “conscious separation” be like, effects on children.
17:30 – 18:26 The happily-ever-after model was created when the average life span was less than 40.
19:21 – 20. 33 How can we stay “in love” and together when mates develop at different speeds?
20:33 – 21:41 Partners being at different levels is NORMAL for long-term unions.
22:03 – 24:13 Biology conspires AGAINST breakups in general, from soul mates to soul hates!
24:32 – 25:15 “Conscious Uncoupling” and the evolution of relationships in the current context.
26:52 – 28:37 “Marriage has changed more in the last 30 years than in the 3,000 years before.”
29:09 – 29:52 At any time in history when women were on an equal power level with men, divorce rates were about the same as they are today.
29:52 – 30:33 Even the most conscious couple can become negative, stingy, etc. in the face of a breakup.
31:23 – 33:27 The Five Steps that people need for a “conscious uncoupling.” The why of it.
33:27 – 34:52 Step 1: Navigating emotions toward positive change: reclamation of anger.
34:52 – 36:51 Step 2: Reclamation of Power, because we often feel powerless; see your 3%.
36:51 – 39:28 Step 3: The meta pattern, usually from a very young age, through you, not to you.
40:18 – 45:41 Awakening from “The Story” that lives in the body – the True You Awakening.
45:42 – 46:15 Step 4: Re-engaging with your circumstances.
46:15 – 47:15 Step 5: Re-engaging beyond the personal process, with your community.
47:46 – 49:06 What if the partner doesn’t go along with the program?
50:33 – 51:12 How to get in touch with Katherine: consciousuncoupling.com, callinyoursoulpartner.com, and callingintheone.com.
51:53 – 53:13 Margherita’s takeaway: her identification with the whole process.
53:31 – 54:45 Katherine’s last words: getting more conscious and getting more command over our inner landscape – the work of our times.
54:45 Thank you’s and goodbye’s.
1:18 Hans joins the conversation.
1:48 How do we separate without pain?
2:01 Hans talks about his life.
3:08 Willing to question the beliefs.
3:28 Single for many years – desire to move into a relationship?
4:26 Original source wounding – patterns from childhood.
5:30 The longing for THE ONE.
7:10 It is up to you!
7:40 Assuming full responsibility for oneself.
9:00 Being in a relationship is the school for development.
10:10 Mark: the experiences are not wasted.
10:20 Heidi: about projections.
12:05 Catch oneself when the projection begins.
13:20 Don’t begin a relationship when you notice projection?
14:25 Margherita’s is not single but whole.
14:56 Dancing the paradox.
15:30 Enjoy living with yourself!
16:00 Cristina.
17:15 Our first relationship is with ourselves!
18:15 Start a relationship as friends.
18:50 Calling in the ONE.
19:05 Conscious uncoupling before looking for a new relationship.
20:34 The One is not what you think it is…
21:30 Relationships don’t need to last the whole life.
22:08 Cristina about separation.
23:45 If you give too much space to the other… establishing the rules.
25:55 Rayne about what we were taught: to look outside of ourselves.
26:24 Sit back and decide for yourself WHO you are.
27:25 Being whole and happy – singles.
28:36 Pioneering these new types of relationship.
29:28 Young people are growing with a different consciousness than we older ones (H+M).
30:00 The assumptions of previous generations.
30:34 Cats enter the scene.
31:32 We don’t have the language yet for the new things/consciousness now emerging.
32:35 Rayne tells about herself: intuition and getting to know yourself and your own gifts – going through the wall.
35:45 Painful breakthrough.
36:15 Comments: Women have duties towards men in Moslem cultures.
37:00 Liberation from these duties in Western cultures.
38:00 Men, get prepared!
38:22 The duty goes both ways – the liberation is for both!
39:24 Traditional worldview also in European countries.
40:18 Integral Map.
41:32 Why development is NOT “going down the drain” – things become more complicated, but….
42:30 With the responsibility for our own choices comes also the responsibility for our mistakes – but more options become available.
43:35 Heidi’s experience when the partner wants you to stay little.
44:20 Going along with the norm is more comfortable, but not authentic.
45:53 Quality over quantity.
47:00 The road less travelled – but so much MORE.
48:00 Thinking about oneself in a different way is harder than changing views about others.
48:40 Our biology is hardwired: paradox between wanting to stay the same and be curious.
49:30 Exploring humanity by exploring ourselves = next step for humanity right now.
50:20 A product of this point in history.
51:00 What if world conditions change?
51:45 Development goes 2 steps up and 1 ¾ back again…
52:00 Question about 7-year cycles.
52:35 Translation and transformation.
Jeff Salzman and Kelly Bearer – Same sex relationships – Is there a difference?
February 12, 2016
04.10 – 5:02 We pick up with Jeff as he recounts his journey into Integral thought.
05:02 – 15:13 Jeff gets into the history of same sex relationships.
15:13 – 21:25 Kelly continues with her history – with lots of shame and guilt.
21:25 – 22:20 Jeff describes “the heartbreaking part of being gay in our generation.”
22:20 – 25:40 How did you survive that part? What happened? Jeff: No shame! Kelly: A slow process, even after moving to Boulder.
25:40 – 28:41 Difficulties even in Integral circles; “just so straight!” And how it got better!
29:01 – 34:50 What is different/not different in same sex relationships? No need for birth control!
35:00 – 36:40 Juicy polarities remain! The greatest engine of evolution is boredom!
37:06 – 37:40 One thing that still pisses Jeff off.
38:54 – 40:54 Squashing polarities as a stage we go through – and acceptance.
40:54 – 43:14 Where is help for kids available? “Them” as a movement.
43:14 – 45:50 Cultural evolution, Deadpool, how kids dress, the Ax commercial.
45:50 – 47:47 What’s next? What’s still taboo? Jeff, “Everybody gets to be who they are…”
47:59 – 48:56 We confess our love for Jeff’s presence and manner, and he gives thanks.
48:56 – 49:38 The Integral European Conference in Hungary in May, etc. Thank you’s.
49:38 – 50:58 Kelly’s “what’s next”: bigger containers for exploration and new contractions for new rules.
51:40 – 53:54 Margherita’s observations from “outside”: “Normal” people don’t get to explore sexuality as much as you (Jeff & Kelly) do! All those who are different.
53:54 – 54.43 Good byes (amidst us falling out again).
0:24 The Wisdom Factory Community (http://bit.ly/WF-community)
1:50 Hans meets Jeff the first time live on video and talks to him.
2:15 The story of Hans regarding Integral in his life.
3:20 The importance of talking to others about what we read in the books.
5:00 Talking about the show: Same Sex Relationships.
5:25 How is the discovery of being gay? Hans was lucky!
6:20 From not liking men to discovering the identity of being gay.
9:35 How is it in Germany as a culture? Is it like in the US?
10:15 It is easier in Germany to be gay?
11:15 Evolution is a matter of time.
11:58 Eros is on our side.
12:06 The more Integral, the more the Universe appears to be friendly – we can have trust and faith in it.
13:00 Other ways of living and being, which had been suppressed in the past.
15:05 Topic: Refugees.
15:20 In Berlin, an Asylum will open for LGBT refugees.
16:45 How are the refugees doing? Especially with the extra challenge?
17:20 Being gay is a reason for asking for asylum.
18:05 Feelings of liberation and safety – and overwhelm.
20:00 That’s what I love about Integral.
20:42 Social work with the AQAL approach.
21:18 A marker of Integral conciousness – you can be friends with everybody.
22:19 Jeff invites Hans on his show to talk about the refugee topic and about Germany.
23:07 The Wisdom Factory; our mission: bringing people together.
23:30 The greater We-space – enhanced by video.
24:20 Being authentic means that we don’t need to “shave and get out of our pajamas,” but just be as we are!
26:41 Meeting live – you can support us by sharing the events, bringing people in!
27:52 Please support our work!
28:50 About removing guilt.
29:25 Integral shows how guilt was important in bringing people from the egocentric to the traditional stage of development.
30:35 When we have integrated responsibility for our actions, then we can let go of guilt.
31:38 Dr.Keith Witt on the evolution of shame and guilt.
32:38 Critique of the “green” teachings – everybody is like us (or should be).
33:54 Overcome versus integrate and transform.
35:00 Something healthy about being able to feel shame.
35:40 Authenticity.
36:00 So much shame in same sex relationships.
38:10 We become relatively free. We don’t get rid of our conditioning, but we learn to not be dominated by it.
38:30 We cannot resolve these questions with the mind.
37:20 The topic is not the topic – it is about healing.
40:10 When we come into this life, we choose the area to work on: we overcome, transform, and integrate what we have learned.
41:56 We are all born with our baggage – talking about the quadrants: where we can experiment and grow.
43:20 Digging into shadow can create extra pressure; it can become an illusion and not authenticity.
44:10 Catch yourself and look at it in a playful, humble way.
44:23 Become a good parent to your younger selves.
44:50 A song: ooops. I did it again.
David Amerland
Why trust is essential in human relationships, at home and in business.
February 26, 2016
4:51 – 10:05 David begins with a mental game to show why we need trust to lead to understanding
11:16 – 17:30 David responds to trust questions by Heidi: example: VW. vs. Toyota
17:30 – 22:25 Moving toward transparency? In the “we” space we know instinctively who to trust but in the I/them space, as between cultures, trust becomes not so ”instinctive”. Likewise on the web.
22:25 – 27:18 The net vs. old brand loyalty and new contexts, trust requires mutual vulnerability and symmetry. example of Amazon vs, Italy and a little shop in Perth in Australia.
27:20 – 29:53 Changing loyalties among different demographic groups and various social media
29:55 – 31:27 Origins of the cultures of Facebook and Google and the consequences thereof. “On Google+…the data is yours. But with Facebook you can’t close your account, they just suspend it and your data is theirs.
31:27 – 32:53 Young people are not naive about the security of various platforms
32:55 – 34:18 More news about the world warps our idea of how “bad” things are. But we are planting seeds of trust around the word.
34:20 – 37:36 “There may be mistrust but mistrust doesn’t mean a complete absence of trust.” David explains.
37:36 – 41:53 Trust from relationship from communication. Works both personally and in business. Measure trust with a trustometer..and then more seriously and all parties are in a fluid flux continually.
42:10 – 49:20 Back to instincts and why trust is so hard to maintain. VW again. German rationality vs. cultural sensitivity and perceptions.With a global culture you have to overlook cultural differences and look for cultural similarities.
49:41 – 55:05 Melanie takes a turn and applies trust to current politicians – especially ONE politician – and David responds that transparency is not enough, we need to see actions, motives, intent, context and a look at history and what we can learn in retrospect.
55:05 – 58:47 Final observations, takeaways, announcements, thank you’s and goodbye’s.
00:00 Welcome and short overview over what was talked about in the main show
4:02 VW in German has lost trustworthiness – ask Hans in Germany
5:45 Meloney: It will take years to built up trust again
7:15 A challenge fo my German identity (Heidi)
8:15 Now nothing is any more produced in one only country
8:45 Back to trust – levels of development and type dependent
11:20 Trust and expectations in context
12:40 Less deception when you look from an integral perspective – the world becomes more friendly
13:50 “Speaking through the flower” – hinting as a communication desaster
15:50 Saying everything instead of hinting is not a guarantee for good communication. Transparency is not the total indicator for trust
17:25 Berlusconi in Italy: You see what you get, so you would be able to chose (if you could see it)
19:00 We can forgive betrayal more of brands than of people
20:08 Initial trust situations in early childhood
22:34 trajectory of close relationships
24:00 What is your motivation for being transparent?
26:00 Importance of timeing of transparency
28:10 You are not in control of what others do with the information you gave them
29:10 When the groom doesn’t show up for the wedding
31:03 Henrik: it is about trusting yourself
33:25 the importance of types (enneagram) and education
35:35 Roy Montero appears for a Monologue
37:32 Mark addresses the “black-and-white” perspective
39:10 Hans: Starting out with trust or with a little suspicion?
40:40 Building relationships quick – Heidi stresses the importance of being able to SEE the speaker
42:30 Seeing people is a different way of communication
44:42 Heidi’s response to Roy: the voice is important, but body language adds to the communication
46:46 Trust in connection with attachment styles
49:00 Meloney asks If you cannot trust yourself you cannot trust others so easily: as you know how you manipulate yourself…… if you did untrustworthy things you don’t trust others 10 times more
50:30 Criminals are very suspicious
52:04 Time heals all wounds?
53:36 We need to tell ourselves a different story
54:50 Self fulfilling prophesy – Hans’s experience as a social worker
56:19 Comment: time destorts details
57:50 Henrik: we try to avoic danger – and add to our suffering
58:33 Mark in favour of time: life experiences come when they come
1:00:00 The decision that things won’t happen any more is not enough: The door opener for Mark: Ken WIlber and Integral Theory seeing the past in a different light
1:02:25 Heidi: Did I waste my time in the past?
1:03:05 Does relocation help? – Heidi’s story to go to Italy and Hans tells his story
1:05:51 Drug addiction – you take your patterns with you….
1:08:00 You can see yourself as fresh, the open moment
1:10:25 You can look at yourself with their eyes
1:11:20 Coming together in family – the old habits – release your expectations
1:14:58 We are co-creating the conversation
Martin Shervington & Martin Ucik – Social Media and Intimate Relationships.
February 19, 2016
2:45 MS: people connect for falling in love – and Internet is a way for doing that
3:50 contact requests on social media
4:50 How Heidi handles contact requests on social media
6;20 on social media you can find people of common ground
7:05 What is an Integral Relationship?
7:30 Looking through the integral lense on any relationship with the “4 Quadrants”
9:00 Typical types of relationships
10:02 Integral couple – masculine and feminine balance
10:41 Referral to David Deida and Ken Wilber
11:20 Intro to Integral and Ken Wilber: Book: Integral Vision
12:15 Integral Theory gives you a framework
12:35 Old fashioned social media: Penthouse and sending letters towards today: how would people connect? Words, visual, psychological
15:23 Love Languages – which one is better for connection on social media?
16:30 Enneatypes are also very important: attraction-, social-, security type. Experience with online dating
17:40 Why would you use social media as a primary strategy to find a partner? Heidi’s experience
19:30 A unique situation!?
20:56 Don’t put a sexy photo on social media if you want a real partner! (Heidi) and why I don’t like dating sites
23:28 Martin S: It is about Intent. 2001 in UK first social media site to connect with historic ex friends of college times
25:00 2007 Facebook opened its doors to non-students, city based, MS was one of the first there – “Are you on Facebook?
26:10 What is your intent? Accordingly you act on social media as you know the steps to change the relationship I am already having with someone – like in real life
27:05 The signal of attention is understood as a signal of intent
27:36 Social Media and Video tools have changed the way of getting to know each other
28:35 MU Before internet we had a very limited access to people – versus the overflow and sense of abondance of possibiliites of today which makes choosing more difficult and a lot of people of other social strada or interests
31:00 the cosmic address and compatability: Integral lense important to navigate the internet and ask the right questions to prequalify potential people
33:00 why there are so many singles and short term serial monogamy
33:50 MS Is the nature of relationships evolving because of technology?
34:50 the nature of relationships is totally different now business wise
35:15 MU it is all about expectations – agreements
36:42 Is there such a thing as a soul mate?
38:20 “Suprasex”
40:42 MU addresses a question of Zuzu
43:56 MU addresses a question about how soon we can recognize the levels of consciousness? Some good advice what to ask a potential partner
46:00 compatibily – checking out before the investing energy?
47:46 Listen to people what and how they speak and how the body language is.
48:49 MU About body language
49:56 The first impression
50:15 MU addresses the question of Krystin
51:30 avoiding physical contact by overcompensating by spending time on Internet
53:01 Naira from Baku joins the conversation
53::40 A testimonial for Martin’s book and how Naira found a person
54:20 Erotica shyness and situation in a Moslem country and in Russia
55:40 Dinner together via Skype
56:10 Mark: Meeting each other in person is just the beginning
56:50 Relationship as inter being and inter becoming
57:50 Commitments and agreements before entering in a committed relationship