Peace

### Summary
The video transcript captures a heartfelt and reflective group conversation held on December 15, 2025. The participants share personal updates, emotional challenges, and experiences related to health, family, and the holiday season. They explore the concept of peace—both inner and outer—and discuss how it manifests differently in their lives. The conversation moves through themes of acceptance, letting go, coping with illness and loss, and the importance of community support. Many reflect on how aging and life’s hardships have shifted their perspectives toward valuing peace over urgency and material concerns. The discussion is infused with warmth, vulnerability, and mutual encouragement, ending with expressions of gratitude and well-wishes for the holiday season and the new year.

### Highlights
– 🔥 Participants share recent personal journeys involving health, family, and seasonal celebrations.
– 🌿 The theme of peace—both internal and external—is deeply explored, emphasizing acceptance and letting go.
– 💪 One member decides against hip replacement, focusing on natural healing and trauma release.
– 🎄 The holiday season brings both joy and stress, with reflections on how traditions and responsibilities evolve with age.
– 🤝 Strong community bonds and support networks emerge as vital for coping with life’s challenges.
– 📚 Spiritual and philosophical reflections, including references to Ken Wilber and Buddhist concepts, enrich the conversation.
– 🎭 Despite hectic schedules and chaos, participants seek moments of calm and presence amid their busy lives.

### Key Insights
– 🌟 **Inner Peace as a Foundation for Outer Peace:** Multiple participants emphasize that peace must first be cultivated internally before it can influence the external world. This aligns with psychological and spiritual teachings that internal equanimity is crucial for coping with life’s uncertainties and external chaos. The consensus suggests peace is less about controlling outcomes and more about accepting reality “as it is.”

– 💔 **Letting Go Amidst Uncertainty and Illness:** The discussion about dealing with a loved one’s serious illness highlights the emotional complexity of acceptance. Letting go of attachment to specific outcomes is portrayed as a gradual process, marked by moments of clarity and struggle. This insight reveals how peace is an evolving state rather than a fixed destination, especially in caregiving contexts.

– 🧠 **Trauma and Physical Health Connection:** One participant’s experience with trauma release and its impact on physical health (weight loss and pain management) underscores the deep mind-body connection. This intimate glimpse into healing suggests that unresolved emotional issues can manifest physically, and addressing trauma can unlock bodily improvements. It highlights the importance of holistic health approaches.

– 🎭 **Community and Shared Vulnerability Foster Resilience:** The group’s dynamic shows how sharing personal stories, challenges, and support creates a unique and nurturing environment. The participants describe a rare cohesion marked by kindness and absence of competition, which contrasts with typical workplace or academic settings. This insight points to the power of intentional community in fostering psychological well-being.

– 🎄 **Evolving Holiday Traditions Reflect Shifting Priorities:** The dialogue reveals how aging and life circumstances lead to reframing of holiday stress and expectations. Participants discuss letting go of overwhelming preparation, embracing simpler celebrations, and finding peace in reduced obligations. This shift exemplifies how life stages influence emotional responses to cultural rituals.

– 📖 **Spiritual Literature as a Tool for Cultivating Presence:** References to Ken Wilber’s *The Simple Feeling of Being* and Buddhist concepts like equanimity illustrate how spiritual and philosophical reading can support mental stillness and acceptance. Such literature encourages participants to shift from constant doing to being, fostering a calmer mindset amidst life’s challenges.

– ⏳ **Acceptance of Life’s Impermanence and Uncertainty:** Stories of witnessing peaceful transitions in death and reflections on family history emphasize the importance of radical acceptance. This acceptance includes embracing both joy and sorrow without resistance, fostering a balanced approach to life’s inevitable changes. It also reveals how past generational wisdom (e.g., “It is like it is”) continues to influence present attitudes.

– 💡 **Balancing Action with Being:** Participants explore the balance between peaceful presence and necessary action. Rather than contrasting doing with being, they suggest mindful action fueled by calmness and intention rather than stress or urgency. This insight encourages a sustainable approach to productivity and living, promoting healthful engagement with life’s demands.

– 😂 **Humor and Lightness Support Emotional Resilience:** Amidst serious topics, moments of humor—such as joking about grumpiness as a sign of health or battling a guava seed stuck in a tooth—offer relief and camaraderie. This balance of lightness and gravity helps maintain group cohesion and emotional well-being.

– 🌍 **Cultural Diversity Enriches the Group Experience:** The presence of members from various cultural backgrounds (e.g., Filipino Simbang Gabi tradition, German family history) broadens perspectives on peace, community, and coping strategies. This diversity highlights how cultural rituals and histories shape individual and collective experiences of meaning.

### Detailed Analysis
The transcript offers a rich tapestry of human experience centered on the universal search for peace in the face of life’s unpredictability. It begins with mundane yet intimate updates—cold flats, trips to England, remodeling bathrooms, family dramas—setting a relatable tone. These everyday challenges intertwine with profound themes such as chronic illness, trauma release, and spiritual growth.

Health narratives, particularly the decision against hip replacement and the discussion of immune therapy, reveal the complexity of balancing medical options with holistic healing and emotional readiness. The trauma release session points to the subtle ways emotional burdens can physically manifest and the transformative potential of healing modalities that address body and mind simultaneously.

The group’s dialogue on peace emphasizes it as a multi-layered, dynamic state. Peace is described as “the peace that passes all understanding,” a phrase evoking surrender beyond intellectual comprehension. This peace involves radical acceptance—not resignation but an active embracing of reality without resistance. The participants acknowledge that peace is not synonymous with everything being “all right” but rather being with whatever “is like it is.”

A recurring theme is the tension between urgency and tranquility. Many recount how aging and life experience have softened their relationship with urgency, allowing more space for calmness and acceptance. The conversation suggests that peace is easier to cultivate when one relinquishes the need to control outcomes or to constantly prove oneself. This shift aligns with broader psychological findings on emotional regulation across the lifespan.

The role of community as a container for vulnerability and support is vividly portrayed. The group’s cohesion, absence of competition, and genuine care stand out as exceptional, fostering resilience and mutual understanding. This aspect underscores the importance of social connections in mental health, especially for those navigating illness and loss.

Cultural reflections enrich the discussion, with one participant describing the Filipino Simbang Gabi—a nine-day pre-Christmas mass filled with music, joy, and communal belonging, which she deeply cherishes despite not being Filipino herself. Another shares a poignant family history of resilience through hardship during World War I. These stories remind us that cultural rituals and inherited wisdom provide anchors of meaning and acceptance in turbulent times.

Spiritual and philosophical elements ground the conversation in contemplative practice. The participants discuss the importance of “being” over “doing,” citing Ken Wilber’s writing and Buddhist lists of virtues such as equanimity. This promotes a mindful approach to life, where presence and acceptance form the basis for thoughtful action rather than reactive busyness.

The conversation is balanced by humor and light moments, illustrating how levity is essential for navigating heavy topics effectively. The group’s warmth and openness create a safe space for sharing both struggles and celebrations, modeling a healthy approach to community dialogue.

In sum, the transcript reveals a group of thoughtful individuals navigating the complexities of life with grace, humor, and spiritual insight. Their reflections on peace, acceptance, community, and presence offer valuable lessons for anyone seeking to find calm amidst chaos and meaning in the everyday.

### Conclusion
This video transcript is a rich, nuanced exploration of peace as a lived experience, shaped by health journeys, family dynamics, cultural traditions, and spiritual practices. The participants’ candid sharing and mutual support highlight the power of community and acceptance in fostering resilience. Their collective wisdom emphasizes that peace is less about external circumstances and more about an internal state of being—one that grows through letting go, presence, and connection. The conversation’s warmth and depth make it a compelling reminder that even amid life’s uncertainties, moments of peace and gratitude can be found and nurtured.

00:00:00
ing. Yes, recording in progress in 15th of December 2025 and this will be our last meeting for this year I would say and I’m happy to see you and I can start with a a check-in because I was in England for 11 days and I came home an hour and a half ago. have now the good fire in my because it was 12 grass in my flat so it was really cold but now I’m cozy sitting right in front of the fire and I’m happy uh for many reasons but also for to see you and that we can end the year >> I 11 days

00:00:51
>> 11 days maybe even from Thursday to to Monday so I don’t know how many that is many, but it seemed to be very few. Actually, I could have stayed longer. >> Nice. >> Nice to see you happy. >> Yes, I really am. And with many visions and u let’s say projects which are not yet clear, but it’s sort of Yeah, we will see. I give over to you GR. >> Yeah. What should I say? Um I was um three weeks in um they they call it um pain-free summit. I I think I’ve talked about it already, the

00:01:48
original body. And that was really revealing and and I I decided I will not have a hip replacement. I will uh find other ways. And um that was kind of relieving was a good decision. So with nutrition, with body structural stuff, with um sports. So we’ll see. Yeah. [sighs] And um in the instant change field there’s a lot of things going on. So they reduce the price for the for the training which is really great. So people and and I have I have had one session today and there was kind of a traum trauma. So

00:02:54
like trauma leaving and I felt like it was sitting in my in my body in my stomach more not stomach in in the in the belly and it was as if the fat around it they there was like a a black thing inside and outside it was wrapped up in fat. And so I couldn’t lose my fat unless I release that old trauma. And I don’t even know what it is, but it was kind of uh streaming out into mother earth. And I felt like now I can lose weight. [laughter] So it was really I don’t know what happened but it felt like a very

00:03:48
yeah very intense weeks right now. Yeah. And on Wednesday my husband has will be [sighs] having a new immune therapy. So we are preparing for that. It’s been it’s been a interesting tough yeah completely out of normal year. So it’s good to complete that and create the new one. Yep. So, I just stumbled in. [laughter] I didn’t have a plan what to say. So, Christine, I hand it over to you. [sighs] Okay. Um, you guys know my check-in is usually that everything’s fine. [laughter]

00:04:56
99% of the time, I’m just cruising along, but I don’t know what’s going I’m very uh disrupted. Um, I mentioned we’ve got a bathroom remodel going on, so there’s that chaos and decision making. There’s Christmas, which is always fun, but a lot of decision making. I’m retiring, so there’s that emotionality. We’ve had two family dramas, my sister having to see her ex-husband, [laughter] which is not that big of a deal, but she calls me to try to deal with that. And

00:05:34
then another family drama. Somebody’s moving away to another state and it’s causing um estrangement uh estrangement within not directly my family but their family. And again they turn to me to see if I can help. Uh both both parties are turning to me and then I have to not tip my hand that I know too much about what anybody has said or anything like that. Um, so that’s been kind of stressful as well. Very sad actually. All except for the bathroom remodeling and Christmas. Those are happy things, good things, but the rest

00:06:12
of it has been more, you know, on the negative side. So, um, yeah, I’m not feeling like myself, my usual buoyant, you know, take it as it comes self. So, um, yeah, but it’s okay. I mean, I I’m aware of what’s going on and uh trying to take better care of myself and ask for what I need. So, just chugging along. I’ve got three more Mondays, three more weeks till the end of the week, end of the month um for work and people are upset. Um so, it makes me sad, but uh yeah, so I’ll go into the office this morning and

00:06:55
probably face more of that again today. and I will turn it over to Mona. >> Yeah, thank you. Um, you are wearing red. It’s good. So, we will get energy. [laughter] Yeah. Uh, I have been I had my bones measured, the density of my bones measured today because the doctor said there routine and it looks like they have become stronger. I don’t maybe it’s because I do access I don’t know why but so I’m not upset that’s fine but I noticed it was a lot of stress without you don’t have to do

00:07:41
much you just lie down there take off your pants and this thing runs over you but obviously it was very stressful for me nevertheless and I slept for two hours afterward [laughter] so my daughter drove me there and that was very nice because she knows herself around and she knows where to park and where to so that was helpful and yeah and otherwise it’s very Christmy. We have lots of light decorations in the windows and also some of our neighbors now decorated as well finally. And uh somebody

00:08:26
our opposite neighbor he hadn’t done anything in 10 years since he’s here. Now this year he has a bite gallon. So that’s very nice to look at. And of course we have our usual uh and we have it on in the morning because it’s very dark and the poor people who have to go to work have some light to look at and otherwise yeah it’s just the usual and we are eating lots of cookies. I have to admit I I got so many I don’t bake so I bought just to be on the safe side and now wherever I look there is a cookie jar

00:09:11
and my husband of course just passing by. Yeah. Well, I’ll I’ll take one. So we are really eating probably eating too much sweets but it’s it’s Christmas. Okay. And I just read that Victoria has another emergency. So I pass on to Heidi. >> You’re muted. >> Yeah, I’m muted. It happens also to me after all these years. Um I got a message from Honey. She’s greeting everybody. She couldn’t come. She says she has no privacy today and she says thank you to everybody for for

00:09:58
what we have supported her a little bit and um that something is showing up for her and it seems that things are going better. Uh that’s is good and yeah happy new year, merry Christmas and all these things she she wrote. So, I’m glad for that. And Anil, in case if you hear it, back to you. Um, I didn’t really hear a topic for today. Maybe in some way letting go. I don’t know. I think of this as a season of trying to find peace. I don’t know. I don’t know if that’s a topic or not. Where we look

00:10:49
for peace, how we find peace. >> It it it’s a good topic for me because in these days I felt complete peace although you know I during the day I more or less was at home in a little flat and but it felt like oh that’s good sir that’s everything. [laughter] So um yeah I think peace is from my present vision something which is happening in oneself. It doesn’t depend very much from outside. Outside yeah it would be good if there was peace but I think if we want to create peace

00:11:35
outside we need to first find it inside. So that’s my my how do you say trigger towards you if you want to to pursue on this topic. >> Just have to apologize that I’m yawning so much. It’s I I don’t know. It was a full day so I’m kind of [laughter] Yeah. So it’s not because it’s boring or anything like that. [laughter] >> Maybe you are in peace now in relaxation and peace with yourself maybe. >> Yeah, it’s good. [laughter] >> Yeah, I think he Sorry. Go ahead. No, go

00:12:36
ahead. Go ahead. Yeah. To be in peace for me it’s also with letting go. [laughter] it’s it’s related and um it’s kind of you know when of course I want my husband to be better and I want him to live long and but there’s also something like being at peace with whatever will happen. So, but I think that’s something it’s not always there, but but there is a growing Yeah. I told you about my brother who has the same and he’s now his wife is pregnant again. So they are

00:13:54
having a third child and it’s kind of like yeah it’s now 5 years or so that and and he’s very strong but he’s living in the the way knowing it could end very soon. So it’s it’s kind of So yeah, there’s of course knowing your priorities but also being at peace if if it’s different if his life pl his soul plan is different. So that was my biggest thing for this year to more and more be with what so and handle and not attached to the outcome. [clears throat] Can I say that? Yeah.

00:15:03
>> Can I ask a question? I don’t know if you’ve experienced this, but if you and and your husband have arrived at peace at different times, like sometimes somebody is like, “No, fight, fight, fight, fight, fight, and the other person’s I’m at peace with this.” Or vice, you know, could be either one, you know. Um, and you may not land at peace at the same time. And I’m not sure if you’ve experienced that or not. I think he he has more a Buddha nature than I do.

00:15:43
So So he was pretty um of course he was afraid. of course he had uh downs and but pretty early on he was like you don’t know and we take it and we do the best that we can do and and he is so for me he’s kind of a role model for that and I had to find my own way not exactly his but to find my way to just be in the moment and do what’s and also when he recovered like slowly to see where’s my role before I had to do everything and now he can like turn on the dishwasher or whatever. So

00:16:48
um yeah to to find a new e equilibrium every time like it’s not fixed it’s a new and I’m working more now than I have been during the whole year things like that or I dare to go to Amsterdam for the uh we flow training. Sorry. >> Um and January. So yeah, to leave him for 4 days that was impossible to think about even um during the summer. [snorts] But yeah, things like that. So I would say he he is pretty much in the moment with whatever he does. So does that help you? Does that help? Do you kind of

00:18:01
bounce off of that to yourself or before I was kind of envious because I I I was more like in my emotions. But since he got sick or we noticed that he was sick, um it I [clears throat] think I I don’t know. I was just and many many people visiting us were astonished that in what mental shape he was. And uh for me it was also like to be with him was a lot easier than if he went into depression or was angry or whatever [snorts] might come out of this diagnosis. But yeah, he was very and grateful for everything I did, we

00:19:13
did as family. So it was it was really loving [snorts] and and that was very supportive for me to to do the things that I needed to do. So he really really appreciated them. So and it’s funny sometimes it’s now getting back to normal. So he is sometimes grumpy [laughter] and and said, “Oh, a good sign of health of regaining health.” So yeah. So hello Gina. >> Glad you came. Do you want to check in? We have hardly begun to talk. >> There we go. Okay. Good. Yes. Good

00:20:07
morning. Good morning, everybody. Um, you may you may be laugh uh g because um one of the girls at my exercise class, which is why I’m late on Mondays, uh said she knew her mother was feeling better when she started getting grumpy and yelling at the TV. And so they were all encouraged that how well she’d recovered because she’s back to shouting at the TV. So, um yeah, I would say it’s it’s been we’re having atmospheric rivers at the moment and um we’re just in between rivers, so

00:20:37
we’ve had a lot of water here and it’s been a lot darker than normal, but the sun just the sun came out. Uh on my way home, I’m like, “Wow, this feels so wonderful just to see it.” Uh it was kind of bright. Um I’m feeling pretty good. I got my ethics application in, so it’s now in the system. Hooray. And so I can relax for the rest of uh the month and uh first week into January and start writing then. But uh it’s nice to not have to do anything to do with school

00:21:10
for a while. Nothing. So that’s good. Um looking forward to uh my girlfriend’s coming from Ottawa and my daughter will come from Vancouver and our usual community of orphans and widowers uh will join us for dinner. So uh I’m feeling very positive and very grateful and um my cohort which is you know 12 of the most wonderful women who are extraordinarily diverse uh from Iran, Brazil, Colombia um just amazing and we all get along so well and uh there’s no competition, there’s only kindness and so we had uh a

00:21:56
farewell to one girl who has to go home to Colombia to look after her father because it’s in her culture that’s what you do when your father needs you. Um but the the support that we had going around this group and the wonderful cohesion I don’t think I’ve ever seen that in an academic situation or work. I mean, we have I feel like we have wonderful cohesion here, but I you know, 18 months ago, we were all strangers and and now we there’s this really deep caring and really deep

00:22:25
check-in and I I we’re I think we’re kind of unique and special. So, I feel very very grateful that for that and also very grateful for um the many and wonderful and unusual friends that I have. But so, it’s I’m just feeling gratitude today. [snorts] Thank you. in in [clears throat] terms of peace. Uh the phrase that goes through my mind and maybe some of you are familiar with this phrase. Um the peace that passes all understanding. Has anybody heard that before? Yeah. And for me that suggests

00:23:14
uh again trying to turn your mind your thinking down because you’re not going to figure it out. And that the wisdom um is not about understanding necessarily but perhaps more the experience or the trust or the hope. I guess peace for me is a hopeful thing. Um, it suggests that everything’s not that it’s going to be all right necessarily. Um, but yes, as as Heidi said, the kind of letting go so that whatever the outcome is, it either way, good or bad, up or down, left or right, it it can be okay. And that it’s not

00:23:57
necessarily understood, but perhaps felt. I don’t know if anybody else relates to that or not. Yeah, I’m right now I’m reading for the first time or again. So uh Ken Wilbur’s the simple feeling of being and it’s just a it’s a spiritual from the first word to the last one probably but uh it brings me peace because we talked about peace and I noticed that I’m trying to think less and just experience being. This is what I really do now regularly all day long. And this book, of course, it’s a mental

00:24:55
challenge, but it’s at the same time it makes me feel at ease just being. So, I can recommend it. I really can recommend it. It’s the simple feeling of being. And actually when I went and saw him in 2006, he signed it. So it’s a very precious book for me, but I haven’t read it really. And now I’m reading it and I’m feeling comfortable with it and at peace. Yeah. Okay. This is um I think an important uh aspect this learning to live in in being you know I also noticed that I think

00:25:53
much less and I’m much more in ah okay when I now when we went around I I learned to drive on the left side by the way it was [laughter] was a big challenge but Still I I didn’t Yeah. When I drove I thought you know how how do I turn around right and how do I ride left and so on that is was a little less being but in a different situations when I was on the other side of the car and didn’t have to take pay attention I really could enjoy to be there and to watch the countryside and we went for instance in something like

00:26:33
Stonehenge it’s not Stonehenge it’s a where all these um stone own blocks let’s say uh in in in the ground and you know it’s just I look around and think ah oh so it’s it’s a completely different uh way of of being actually yeah this feeling of being instead of needing to arrive somewhere and needing to worry about I don’t know what you know and this for me was a good experience and it I would say I’m still in that. So being instead of doing we are not human doings. No, we are meant

00:27:21
to be human beings, aren’t we? Oh, by the way, I was also challenged by the English uh dialect with some people because I learned English more on the American side and [laughter] and sometimes when three or four people talk like this and quickly, oh, I feel like I have to do a course in British English and learn a little bit more of the words. I realized that I’m not good in expressing myself because these words are missing. Now they come in Italian instead and so maybe I do another course. Maybe

00:28:01
somebody of you knows a good um online course which I could take. Uh we will see. I give over to who wants to be. I’m just thinking of my when my mom died, she was 88 and um dementia and so she still recognized us but like five year old [laughter] level and uh she had a stroke um 4 days before she passed and and somehow the day before I felt like I have to visit her and hopped on the car and went there just out of didn’t know why but I just had a very big urge to be there and um she had a stenosis so her

00:28:58
was not 4 cm diameter but 0.4 before. So, um, so she could just collapse anytime or whatever. So, this was one of the causes for the stroke and I was there before. So, in the afternoon or so, I came there and then she was lying in bed and was like really breathing very hard. So like and um I I didn’t know what to do. So I just laid down in in bed and took her and said, “Oh, mom, what can I do?” And she really came out of almost not having enough breath and and really anxious and whatever. And then she said, “Oh, it is

00:29:58
like it is.” And it was repeatedly she so after after that and it fell and then she looked at me, she smiled at me and my father said when she was 16, he first fell in love with her. She didn’t want to marry him then, but after the war then. Um, and I could I could see that little girl or not yet grown up girl and that my father fell in love with and and this was like very peaceful moments even though they were life-threatening at the I mean the the breathing and and I felt very much at ease and then

00:30:49
then uh she said well you have to drive home and so she was a little bit anxious. Um, and I left her and in the morning the the nurses found her. So it was the last time I could even speak to her and the last days, the last four days there were I I was there constantly. Uh, so somebody of us was there constantly to to be with her and and she had the hand of one of my siblings and when this one left somebody else had to take over. So she never lost hand contact. And and then I said when when she passed

00:31:34
it was very peaceful, very slowly. Uh so diminishing the the breathing and all of a sudden there was and then you know you hardly knew the difference. And I was sitting there for death watch during the night and it was so peaceful, so like like and a shaman friend of mine, I was calling him from there and he said, “Let me check in.” [laughter] [snorts] Okay, this is this is uh not noble, but your mom is like a little girl skipping into the light. [snorts] So without any detour or any hesitation.

00:32:20
So so I could feel like [snorts] and it was so yeah and for me that night or that those days were really like I’m not afraid of dying. Not at all. This kind of a very was different. My my dad was different. But this was if you don’t have any any things to regret and then can be just a very nice, very soft, very peaceful transition. And yeah, I was just thinking peaceful was in the midst of life-threatening not being able to breathe and then said, “Oh, it is like it is.” So, yeah. And as Christine said, it’s not

00:33:29
that everything’s going to be all right. It’s just can you be with what’s so >> yeah was just reminded of that. I wanted to add you say can you be what is so and the same as with good things you know can can you be with good things or do you say oh no I don’t merit this and blah blah blah blah blah all these um attitudes we had picked up maybe in in the past so just not to overflow with uh excitement and not to overflow with um with fear but Find the balance. No. And that’s what I would call also peace.

00:34:21
Find the peace within you, you know. And do not prefer one side over the other. Let’s say and even when you I I’m learning when I don’t feel well, not to flee and think, oh, it might I hopefully it will pass, but to feel into it and see, oh, what is this? How does it feel? And then normally it melts away in some way this dis this dis this ease. [snorts] Yeah. Victoria, say what you have written in the chat. That would be good. >> Oh, okay. Yeah. Well, I I’ve mentioned it I I guess in the frownen or the

00:35:36
integral and frown or somewhere because I remember because it was in in a German context. Um my late husband’s grandmother um lost came from a very wealthy family and was she was from Nerburgg in Germany and she married a Polish uh aristocrat who was in the army and uh they invested their entire fortune which was considerable in war bonds to help um the cause in the first world war and lost everything of course and so she eaked out her days. They were completely I mean they had nothing at the end of World War I. And she learned

00:36:14
to make mustard and she sold it doortodoor. And then she made these little figures out of dried um well out of prunes and peanuts. They’re if I keep I bring them out at Christmas. So I haven’t brought them out yet. But they’re um flowman or something. I don’t remember what their name is in German. um they’re these wonderful little figures and she made them um and sold them doortodoor along with the mustard and that’s how they survived. And her um her saying that that that went through

00:36:46
the generations in the family and I I learned it um was vist which means um it’s it’s it’s it’s just right the way it is. So that ex of of radical acceptance I guess would be the um you know like rad radical acceptance therapy or whatever um in psychology. Uh and but it was so powerful that in the family that it went it passed on through the generations of this sense of acceptance regardless of the circumstances. And um yeah, I put in the reference to Christine when you came and you

00:37:24
mentioned um the peace that passes all understanding, which I love too. That’s a great great phrase. So that’s from Philippians. Um but that sense of uh and in my Buddhist groups um I’ve done so many now I feel like I’ve well I was I won’t say it. Um but the in almost every Buddhist list um because the Buddha loved lists of all kinds and there are thousands and thousands of them in almost every single list um one of the virtues is equinimity and it’s one of the few that goes cuts

00:38:01
right through this like in like in every the short list the long list whether you’re studying the virtues or um skillful behavior or what it’s there it always comes comes up and it’s one of the few that’s that you keep seeing again and again and um and I think that’s the same idea this equinimity whatever happens you’re um you accept it and you do what you can but you don’t you don’t resist and you don’t um despair and you just kind of keep forging ahead um yeah sorry I couldn’t come on before

00:38:37
I I um I’m celebrating Simbangab um which is a Filipino holiday. It goes for 9 days and it’s very intense. Um and it starts in in the in the dark in the morning with a mass and there was the one last night, a huge one with three bishops and it was a really big deal. Um I just love it more than life itself. I wait all year for it. And um this morning there was a mass at dawn. Well, before dawn, it was still dark and then they had this breakfast afterwards and one of the members of the Filipino

00:39:10
community brought these fabulous um guavas from his tree and I bit into one and the the seed embedded itself. I’m waiting to get a crown. I’m waiting for my insurance to clear it because it’s thousands of dollars. Anyway, um it threw me into a total panic. Talk about VSTist. Um, so I was I was I was I’ve been fighting to try to get Oh, there she is. Hello. Um, I’ve been trying to get it out. So, that was it was it was not a So, I heard everything everybody said, but it was I

00:39:42
was battling with my tooth and I didn’t want you to have to look at that. And I didn’t succeed, so I have to go to the dentist at 3:30. But anyway, that’s my check-in and my check out. And I mean, I’m not going to wait, but Hello, >> V. Victoria, do you have >> Can I just ask a question? >> Yeah. So, I’m curious, what is it about the Filipino nine days that you experience, especially in terms of peace? What does it offer you that other other rituals haven’t? What What is it

00:40:12
that you love that? >> Thank you. Well, thank you. Um, it’s it’s just incredibly full of joy and expectation. It really makes Advent feel like Advent. like um it’s almost it’s almost a letdown when Christmas finally comes around because you’ve been like really going at it for nine days and getting up in the dark and going to mass in the dark and there’s um tons of music and singing. It’s in Tagalog, which is a language I have no clue what anything means, but I love it’s all

00:40:45
vowels. Not all vowels, but it’s easy to sing. It’s in our alphabet. So they po they put on the big screen the songs the words and I sing along lustily and there’s a big choir and everyone’s dressed up and um the Filipino community um I mean we go to we’ve been going to a church daily mass that we’re not members of and we never will join but they they were the ones who welcomed us the fir literally the first day we walked in years ago now um and embraced us as being part of their community and we’re

00:41:18
not Filipino. we have nothing to do with it. And and it’s interesting the church is like half Filipino and half um Hispanic. And the Hispanic community, which I would have expected would have been like that because I’ve I know a lot of I have a lot of friends who are Mexican um were standoffish. I think because of the language, I mean, because they have their own Spanish mass. The Filipinos wait all year for these nine days of masses that you know the most the stuff’s in in in English but but the

00:41:46
songs are all in Tagalog and but it for me I’ve never been to the Philippines but it’s that sense of where you’re being embraced and included and you’re like family and you absolutely absolutely don’t deserve it. Like you I don’t have a clue about the language or the cultures. Well, now I’m learning but it it’s so beautiful. Like talk about orphans. Um I think Gina, you were mentioning you have Christmas for all your orphaned friends and um I’m I’m very much orphaned and so is my friend

00:42:16
Alfred. We have been for years and that’s the miracle is like this um we have this family and we don’t deserve it and it’s just beautiful. But thanks for that question Christine. Okay, over to you Beatatric. You look >> just a minute. Is how is your roof coming along? Oh. Um, it’s finished allegedly. Um, they’re halfway through the solar panels waiting for some kind of inspector. Very stressful and very nightmarish, but thank you. But there is a roof. There is a roof. There is hope.

00:42:52
Okay. Thank you for the questions and everything. Okay, Beatatrice, over to you. >> Um, sorry I’m late everybody. I was still sleeping. Uh just finished the second weekend of Nutcracker. Um we’ve done 10 shows and we have 10 shows to go. Um [laughter] uh I have three days off now. Um and then I work seven days in a row starting Thursday. Um, so these are my three days to get all of my resting in, to get all of my laundry done, to get all of my packing done, to get all of my Christmas

00:43:37
gifts. [laughter] [gasps] Uh, everything comes down to these three days. Um, and then I’ll be in full work mode for seven days. The first couple ones I’m doing some prep work and other things and then and then it’s two shows a day. So that’s my whole world. Um I got to call the cues for the student show last week. Um that’s my first time doing something doing that and that was very exciting and also a lot of adrenaline. Um I don’t know. That’s that’s really everything right now.

00:44:16
We’ve had more sunshine and more like a little bit warmer weather. Um, that’s a little bit unusual for this time of year, but it’s been nice. So, when I do get to go outside, which is rare, get to enjoy that. That’s about what I’ve got to say at the moment. Is your boyfriend traveling with you at Christmas or is he going in to his own family? >> Um, both of our families are in San Diego, so that’s convenient. We might We’re still sorting out all the logistics. Um Gayen’s grandmother lives

00:44:54
in LA and can’t travel anymore and so I think that whole family is planning to do Christmas there and they’ve invited my mother and me to join. Um so yeah, we’re still figuring out the logistics, but we’re probably going to do a couple days for Christmas up there and then the rest of the time in San Diego. Yeah, that fits in with the orphan theme, I think. So, we started out talking about peace. So, let’s have Christmas as a celebration of peace. Just [clears throat] looking at my

00:45:56
calendar. So, we will have another meeting this year on the 29th. Or we could if you want. >> Should we finish here at checkout and talk about it later after the recording? Okay, you can start with check out, Mona. um peacefully. [laughter] Um yeah. Well, there are a couple of things that have not been quite covered yet like our change of the administration of our house and but we sort of take it in stride and there are younger ones who can take care of that as well. And Yeah, it’s for me it’s easier to be

00:46:49
peaceful than to be on the go and eager to do and to accomplish something. So, as I also as I also have been saying for quite some time now, it’s it’s past. It’s all right as it is. Yeah. I’m passing on to get um when you were talking about the book and being it doesn’t mean that we don’t do anything. It’s just out of what state of mind are we going into action [snorts] and in what speed and is it adrenaline fueled or more oxytocin or other nice hormones. So, so for me it’s not either action or

00:47:51
not [laughter] and being it’s it’s more like can I first go into being and being peaceful or yeah whatever I wish to be and then looking what action might be appropriate to what’s in front of me but but not out of this hamster wheel thing or I have to and things like that. So [sighs] yeah, I’m something like may there be many moments of peace from which our daily life actions dwell. Yeah. And this year is special when we go to Christmas to to one of our daughters and the others come there to visit.

00:49:12
Yeah. To to be grateful for where we landed. It was so different in March. I couldn’t expect that. And so a lot of gratitude coming with that piece. And by the way, say hello to Tom, please, Christine. I think when I was younger, you know, uh, so much of preparation for Christmas was up to me. Everything from decorating to the food to the carols to the presents, the whole thing, right? And um, so I didn’t feel any Christmas peace until I had I was all prepared, right? all the advent preparation,

00:50:09
but the advent preparation wasn’t a peaceful thing. It was like, ah, what more do I have to do? And so, one, you know, it helps when your children are adults. There’s not as much to do. You can let go of some of that. I’ve let go of a lot of it. So, this year is different again, I think, because we’ve got stuff going on in our house. I haven’t, you know, I haven’t cooked. I haven’t been doing as much decorating. I’ve let a lot of it go. So, I do feel like there’s a certain amount of peace

00:50:37
that is accessible around Christmas. Um, that normally I’d be on the on the treadmill trying to get things done. So, uh, it’s one of the good things about getting older. You realize what you don’t want to hang on to anymore, what’s not necessary to hang on to anymore. So, um, that’s a benefit of, uh, of getting older. Well, I’ll I’ll pick up from that because two things came to mind. So, I’ll go with the first thing. The first thing was uh that uh common thing uh in

00:51:22
churches is at some point you turn to people around you and say peace be with you. And even though I think that was meant to be genuine, um, actually for me in that scenario, being told when to say that actually felt kind of awkward, but I have to say that with this group this morning, I’m feeling like we can say that and or I feel like I can say that in a far more genuine way. And I’m like, yeah, my peace be with you. And I it just it just feels like you can maybe when I’m wishing people merry Christmas

00:51:55
this this season, maybe I’ll say merry Christmas and my peace be with you because I think it’s just coming from a different place. And part of it is uh certainly Christine, I’ve been super type a like I had to make all those cookies. I had to do everything. I had to do everything myself. And um and uh just letting some of that go. And so, uh, one of the things I’ve I’ve let go is, uh, one of my my widow friend said, “Gina, would you like me to bring a U log?” I actually remember uoggs and how

00:52:29
delicious they were. And I went, instead of my usual dessert, always the same dessert of Christmas. I’m like, “Yeah, okay. You can bring a uog.” And it’s just even one thing uh that it’s different and it’ll be delicious cuz it’s being made by the Italian bakery. So yummy. Um but it’s it is calming it down. And so I have learned to segment and let things go and not over decorate and and also at this point I still am working a little bit for our coast guard but I have not the usual pressures and you

00:53:08
know this time last year I was planning my father’s funeral. So it’s a very different year this year and um just knowing that it’s okay this year is just fine and the way it is the way it is is all right. And so, um, I’m sort of looking forward to feeling what it feels like to relax for a couple weeks. Even though people try to ramp up Christmas, I’m like, “No, I think I’ll just be peaceful and relaxed.” So, um, I’m grateful for having this conversation with you today.

00:53:36
>> Can you say what your is? >> Oh, yulog. Ah, decor. Um, it’s a rolled cake with like the cream, not sweet, uh, rolled with cream icing and maybe jam, but it’s then you decorate it with a chocolate icing to make it look like a log and you put a little holly leaf on it to make it Christmy. >> Oh, which reminds me of the the other thing. Um, I’m I was pretty excited because I’m not a big decorator because I have a ton of it. My husband hates it, but my uh brother brought up my mom’s

00:54:12
embroidery from um from Florida from the Florida condo and it’s a Christmas theme and it’s about this big and it’s very beautiful embroidery and it has um some little birds embroidered on it and then some real birds uh at the top and a little bit of holly and I’ve I made a hole in my front door so that I could hang it and it’s so that’s my interesting thing for decorating. I’ve put this beautiful uh work of art of my mother’s on the front door. So, I feel like it’s it’s

00:54:47
kind of different. Something again, something different this year, but not hard. All I had to do is screw a hole into my [laughter] door. Yeah, it’s fun. Thank you, So, how will be your peaceful Christmas, Beatrice and Victoria? Well, I was just thinking about how this is a season of everything quieting down or it’s supposed to be. That’s what nature does. And instead, we all amp up. And especially with my profession. >> Yeah. [laughter] >> It’s the it’s kind of the the most busy.

00:55:40
It it’s the it’s the production that we do the most shows of and have the most weeks of um the whole year. Um so it’s the opposite of peaceful. [laughter] Um, but I think maybe there can be a little bit of peace in the the routine of it or something. You know, it’s we’ve we’ve decorated our office at the theater with Christmas lights and it’s quite nice in there and um and it’s, you know, next week is going to be long a long long marathon, but we keep doing the same show. you

00:56:18
know, it’s it there’s kind of a routine and so maybe there’s something to rest or be peaceful in there. Um, so that’s that’s what I’m thinking about. Um, yeah, I hope I hope that I can find time for rest on on my holiday break. Um, but it’s also the time to visit with family and do things and [laughter] catch up on other things. and my mother and I, it’s I think it’s it’s waiting to be confirmed, but we’re uh possibly doing a performance in April um together, and this might be our only

00:56:55
opportunity to actually work on it or talk about it um in person. So, our Christmas break may additionally be filled with activity. though. But I guess yeah, somebody said it’s it’s a state of mind or something. I think that was Gertrude. Um, so maybe that’s what I need to find is the the peace the piece underneath Was that the Did she leave? There’s an image in there. Um, oh, I had something profound to say now. I forgot what it was. Oh, there you are. Um, what was I going to say that was so

00:57:53
profound? The Oh, the peace underneath. Yeah, I think it that’s I think that’s so interesting because we always think about the peace on the surface and the turbulence underneath. Like with people that don’t express their emotions, they’re they can be totally dead pan and or always seem cheerful and they’re always cheerful no matter what. Like the sky could be falling in and they’re still cheerful and you know that somewhere down deep in there inside there’s some kind of turbulence. I mean

00:58:20
it’s most likely but they keep the surface smooth and um so that’s intrigues me. I’m going to think about that the piece underneath um because there sure certainly yeah I feel very integrated in my chaos um right now I feel like there’s chaos on the surface and chaos underneath and it’s all chaos so it’s um [snorts] very consistent um yeah I so I’m hoping for peace somehow somewhere but I have to say that yeah this somehow there’s something about celebrating it’s it feels a little bit like

00:58:57
procrastination. It’s this fabulous like, oh, we’ll just do all these fabulous things and worry about the problems later. and my um father-in-law whom I also didn’t know um a very I seem to intimately know people that I never met um he was the city manager of the city of Lintz and um so he had tons and tons of responsibilities employees and he used to say there’s nothing so urgent that it won’t become just a tiny bit more urgent if I leave it for a day. So, I’ll leave you all with that is it’s

00:59:36
my advent message that there’s nothing so urgent that won’t just be a little bit more urgent. So, go for it. Um, yeah, peace to everybody and uh, thanks for being patient with my in and out today and pray for my that the guava seed will be successfully dislodged. >> [snorts] >> Um, are we passing around? Who’s I I think Mona, you haven’t checked out yet. You did. Oh, am I off? Okay. I’m sorry. It’s okay. Heidi is Heidi the last. >> Obviously, >> you’re always the last. Okay.

01:00:15
>> I was the first today. So, the last now. Yeah. What should I say? I find it absolutely right that with age peace is easier to Because you realize that all this urgency you have to show off what you can do and you have to do all this it falls away for me also Christmas urge is nowhere I I don’t want to have gifts and I don’t give gifts to anybody. So I mean it’s about 30 or 40 years that I have invented this um agreement with myself and the others. I don’t care if if they find it okay or not. I had this

01:01:02
with Marcus and he wanted to give me something for for Christmas. I said I don’t want anything, you know, and I don’t even want to be obliged then to to to give back something, you know. I give when I think oh that’s a nice thing for for the person then I buy it and and I saw him to be preoccupied about 14 nephews and everybody has to and the the daughters and the oh you know in Italy say they say Kimlo fafa who is making me do this you know [laughter] so it’s Um I I I want be part of that. On the other

01:01:51
hand, um it’s nice to get sometimes some gifts, but they must not be material. And I feel very much gifted in this moment of my life. So I’m really really grateful. For me, this year was amazing. First it started really like and now it’s the complete opposite. And I’m happy about that and very much looking forward to the future. And that now we talk about if you meet us again otherwise next year. And I stop the recording. And to whoever is listening, merry Christmas and happy new year. And

01:02:35
to you certainly too.